Work.

So lately I have been reading a lot of books. The current book is called Never a City So Real by Alex Kotlowitz. I just finished it. Its about different individuals that live and breathe in Chicago. There's a steel worker and a restaurant owner and others. Kotlowitz followed them around for a few days and just writes what it is like to be in their shoes. What they do, how they feel about certain politics, their dreams for their kids, and so on.

One of the people Kotlowitz writes about is an artist by the name of Robert Guinan.

These are two of his paintings. He's in his sixties (maybe seventies) and has been painting for a while. He draws the people of the city. But he wasn't appreciated in Chicago, where he was born and raised. In fact he is more known overseas in France.

This is one of his stories from the book:

"During the ceremony, the minister told a story about a boy who saw a lightning bug. The boy wondered why the lightning bug lit up like that, so he asked his father. His father, who wasn't an educated man, could only think to reply, 'It's just something in him.' Then the minister went on. 'People ask us why we sing, why we shout, why we fall out? It's just something in us.'"

Why are some people teachers and others counselors or journalists or pastors or anything? It is just something in us. We can't stop being us. We try and then we sometimes end up being happy.

I was talking to my mom today about vacations. I brought up what I heard Erwin McManus said via a podcast "People love vacations because they hate their jobs." We have this 'American dream' mentality to achieve success so we end up doing things that we don't necessarily enjoy or fully love.

When people ask my why I do my job, I want to be able to say because I love it and it's in me. I don't want to say "To pay the bills."

P.S. Exactly six weeks till I leave for Chicago.