Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Sticks and stones.

So on my desktop I get these quotes that pop up every thirty or sixty seconds. I love them. Sometimes they are quotes from "Management Manual" and say something like "Never do anything stupid on purpose." And other times there are quotes from Einstein or Voltaire or Oscar Wilde. It can be pretty random.

One time there was a quote from My So-Called Life (Yes, random) and it said something like "sometimes someone says something that fits right into the whole in your heart." I feel like this is a cheesier version of what it said. But I completely agree with this. My friend Rel always seems to text me when I need it the most. And its always something simple, like I'm praying for you Jane. Or I love you Janeyy. This is her. She's one of the most ridiculous human being I know, but I wouldn't want her any other way.

And really I wasn't even having a bad day. I was just annoyed. Here's why:
I spend most of my days with these three people. Mike, Ash and Brad. They are the other Athletic Trainers in my class. There are only four of us in our AT classes but we also have other classes together with the AES (applied exercise science) majors. And I work baseball with Brad. And Ash is basically who I spend all my free nights with because we are basically the same. So I see these kids A LOT. And I love them. They are my brothers and sister and they make me laugh. But sometimes I just want to punch them in the face.
Anyway, I was just annoyed with them and I get this text from Rel. And it just calmed my heart. Like it didn't matter that these guys didn't get it. Someone out there was thinking of me. And that's all I needed to make my life better at that moment.
So during my break between classes I randomly called my mom at her work. (She's a librarian at an elementary). But she had a class in the Library and couldn't talk long. So I just said, I love you. And she told me that that is exactly what she needed to hear at that moment. How crazy is it that we have this power with our words to say the right thing to people?
But then with a single word we can also completely tear someone down. And probably not even realize it. Like the sarcastic jokes that we make with our good friends. Sometimes we can take it too far but they aren't going to tell us and eventually they will get over it.
Or then what about lack of words. The silent treatment. That can actually say a lot too and completely mess with a person. For example, the Athletic Trainer that I work with was giving me and this other girl, Lyndsay, the silent treatment during practice one time. We were freaking out and trying to think of what we even did wrong, like what we said. And it made for such an awkward tear down and post treatment of the athletes that we finally asked him at the end what we did. And really, he was just playing a joke on us. You could say we were pretty pissed and hurt that he thought it would be funny to do this. It was also super un-professional. But that lack of words made us completely ill at ease and we were unable to focus or do anything really during that 'silent treatment.'
And how do you tell someone who you aren't talking to what exactly is wrong? You want them to just realize what they need to do without having to say anything to them. Wouldn't that be fantastic? But then it defeats the purpose of communication in general. We can't take away the bad things of talking without affecting the good things that talking accomplishes.

It reminds me of the childhood saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me." That is false.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

so true! we should never dismiss opportunities to encourage!

Danielle Fletcher. said...

I love you, Jane.
p.s. you look super cute in both of these pictures.